In an instant our lives can change – sometimes for the better, but usually not. It really is how we deal with these situations that determines who we are and how strong we find ourselves to be, or become.
This was affirmed when my partner and I found ourselves out of work for the last five months (eight for him). It is what one might call a make or break of any relationship.
This is where nerves split and fray. This is where too much time together under duress makes one start plotting murder. Times like these tests one’s mettle.
Believe it or not, there was a time where this could have killed our relationship. I
have had a temper and can hold a grudge like no one’s business. Not even Sarah Michelle Gellar. (Get it?) There used to be times when we’d have altercations where I am sure I acted out and acted immature. I can’t tell you how many times in the past that I’d storm out of the house and go to my office. It was a good thing for a number of years my area operated 24/7. The days that followed would be me giving the silent treatment while I pouted. I was good at that. Really you might want to see Rebecca’s 3/26/07 blog entry which only vaguely references me! (”I’m not thinkin‘ nothing’”.)
But really, that was years ago. …at least the storming out and silent treatment. I can still pout like no one’s business.
The maturity one gains over a 20 plus year relationship can be pretty amazing. These last eight months has probably been the biggest struggle we’ve faced – including all the health issues I’ve encountered over the years. I am proud of how we stepped up to the plate and supported one another accordingly with nary an argument. When one was down, the other would pick them up and vice versa. We never were too down because we knew we had each other – and no matter what else happened, that would always be enough.
All I can say is – we passed the test. I’m not sure which test or who the proctor was, but we get an honours level grade.
a companion piece was originally posted on Gay Men Rule (which no longer exists).