I Feel Pretty

It’s not the prettiest post in the world, I’ll admit that right up front.  And I’m not even sure why I’m telling you about it at all.  Maybe I just have nothing else to say.

Because I’m not repulsive enough, I now have a wart.  Well, two actually.  The second one I’ve had for years.

One is my right thumb.  I swear it appeared overnight to where I thought it was just a callous.  Denton is the one who had to tell me it was a frickin’ wart.

Immediately I felt so dirty!  I kind of still do. Icky. It’s a virus – and nothing I can do to (th)wart it off.   So what else is there to do but attempt Compound W?   It is the first line of defense – I guess.

Not that it worked on my other wart.  But I don’t know that that stuff is supposed to be effective on plantar warts.  Especially ones on the bottom of your foot.  Maybe those can only be on your feet.  I don’t know.  I could Goooooogle it, but honestly, I don’t want to read about it.

That thing has just become a part of my life because I’ve had it so long since I’m big enough of a wuss.  That and the ability to get into a dermatologist is a full-time job.

Honestly, I went there once about it and I came away with physician advice to use duct tape on it (yes, you heard that right).    ….and a prescription for wart removal.  Genital warts!!!!  I kid you not, that’s what they thought would work. Yeah, that was fun to be filled.  It hurt.  It burned.  It was expensive. And it didn’t work.

I’d slather it on (ok…dab) and then put on the duct tape.  Now it turns out the tape doesn’t really get rid of it, but it does keep it at bay…..from growing and hurting.  Maybe on others it works, or maybe I just have a mutant wart.  Dunno.

I just stick a piece of tape on until it falls off and then put a new one on.  It usually stays on for a few days.

I know I have to get it burned off – or whatever they do – eventually.  But it is not today or tomorrow….or anytime soon.

I will have to remain repulsive for a while longer.

Song by:  Maria from West Side Story

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One response to “I Feel Pretty

  1. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder – warts and all. There was time my hands were covered in unsightly warts until I tried what I believed at the time a stupid idea – but what had I to lose. I covered them in saliva each morning. ( Spit is supposed to be poison) and hey presto no more warts.

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