Category Archives: Religion

Come to Jesus

I love walking around work the day after Mardi Gras.  All these people with ashes on their forehead.

But I’m loving the someecards that I came across my email yesterday.


People might find religion, or at least find it more interesting or tolerable if it were limited to 140 characters.


Song by: Mindy Smith

Like a Prayer

I know it’s been a few days with no posting.  Work things, ya know.   More on that later, I guess.

I was back in DC and while it’s a happening town, with all the political protests and some gathering for special causes and interests, oddly enough you just don’t see things what I would consider out of the ordinary.   Mind you – maybe I’m not the benchmark for what is normal, but even I know a freak show when I see it.

Like this.



Oddly enough I didn’t have my camera camera on me, so I had to settle to use my crappy cellphone one.  I should have just walked up to them and snapped away, but I didn’t.  I mean it’s not like they were going to chase me down – they were media whores.

Let me set up what they were doing.  Praying.  With megaphones.

Yes, some group or other was conducting an entire novina to protest the showing of Jerry Springer – the Opera at Studio in the gayest part of DC.

And while yes, it is a gay-hood, there are mega numbers of straight people there. And since it is DC, very multi-ethnic as well.  With that big of a cross-section, I saw no one who didn’t stop and just shake their head like these boys (I do believe they were all male.  Priests, perhaps?  Seminary students?  Pedophiles?  All of the Above?).

Except for the two dozen or so participants, everyone else thought they were nuts.

I don’t know anything about the show, except it combines two of my least favourite things:  Opera (sorry Jon M, sorry Ade) and Jerry Springer.  Wouldn’t attending this be like going to hell?  If you can read their very expensive protest signs (really – where do they come up with funding to make these?), apparently the show makes reference to the virgin mary and her body.   Again – I don’t care enough to care.

But it was fun to watch.  Probably more so than the opera.

Song by: John Wesley Harding (ha! I bet you thought I’d say Madonna)

All g-d’s Children

I had heard one of the more interesting political / religious stories (seriously – when don’t they overlap anymore?) this last weekend via NPR’s On the Media.

The guest was a woman who had written a book on Evangelicals and their true relationship with the GOP, the so-called major players of the religious/political movement (Falwell, Dobson, etc) and the influence of those leaders – or more accurately – their lack of it.

Christine Wicker, the author of this book, was a former evangelical herself , but not with an axe to grind, and is also a journalist. She fully admits to how the right-wing religious folk completely used the media to forward an agenda and statistics that were not accurate – including the one of their being a ‘liberal media’.

But I also love the fact that she breaks down the myth that 1 in 4 americans are evangelical of some kind – and she does it through a variety of methods. The best number she can estimate is 7%. Not 25. …and that most don’t even know who James Dobson is. Bonus points!

Anyway – for us non-jebus worshiping voters, it provides a small glimmer of hope.

You can listen to the entire segment here (or below) – as the transcript is not available in text format until sometime on Monday.

Song by: the Finn Brothers

g-d is a real estate developer

You know the Bible 69%!

Wow! You are truly a student of the Bible! Some of the questions were difficult, but they didn’t slow you down! You know the books, the characters, the events . . . Very impressive!

Ultimate Bible Quiz
Create MySpace Quizzes

I totally swiped this from Curtis’ blog. He went to bible college – and clearly, I think we all know that I did not.

Though they say I’m ‘very impressive’ – and I am, just not in bible stuff – some of the questions were just a little too easy if you went by process of elimination. Many have them have nothing to do with biblical knowledge.

I was a little disappointed they didn’t tell me which questions I got right or wrong. How will I ever learn??? Don’t say by reading the book – that’s never gonna happen.

It’s probably not a coincidence that my score was a 69. I guess I couldn’t get a 666, so that’s the number they had to settle on.

Song by: Michelle Shocked

Love is the Drug

Oh no!!!! The pope says that sex is like a drug!!!!

Fuck – let’s hope so!!! It’s not like I have any other vices left – unless you count food and chocolate.

Actually CNN says the pope says that.  If you really look/listen further into the text/quote, he says it, but not in the context to which you (or I) think.

When talking about THE church’s 40th anniversary on their document that condems contraception, Benedict expressed concern that human life risks losing its value in today’s culture, and worried that sex could “transform itself into a drug” that one partner had to have even against the will of the other.

Well, that’s just rape.  Or manipulation.  I’m sure the catholic church wouldn’t know anything about that!

I was really hoping for a story on sex addiction or something…..which usually include rape, manipulation and an altar boy or priest.   What?  Too sweeping of a generalization?

On an unrelated note (or is it?) – some naval rear admiral (hehe, I said ‘rear’) was demoted and fired for having an affair 18 YEARS ago!!!!

Are you fucking kidding me??

Oh – and he nailed the broad in the White House during Bush 1’s term.   Apparently the big faux pas wasn’t that he had sex, or in the White House, but that he lied to the woman saying he was a widower when he was actually still married!!!

OH NO!!!!!   A man lying to get into someone’s pants??   What has this world come to???   (Maybe we should ask Fr. Flanagan!)

But I am dying that the Department of Defense if finally catching up with this guy almost two decades later.  It leaves our current soldiers free to rape Iraqi civilians without fear of punishment…..at least for two decades.

Song by: Roxy Music

Them There Eyes

I don’t really have a post subject matter at hand. It’s been a whirlwind few days in DC – work work work. No play. So this is all just random thoughts.

But it was beautiful. The weather couldn’t have been nicer, but these folks seem to think they are in the deep south. 50 degrees and they are still wearing gloves and scarves. …and still are when the temps creep into the 70s. Me? I’m wearing nothing but a shirt and suit coat. ….well, pants too. But no overcoat. I didn’t even pack one.

It is also the end of Cherry Blossom Festival and from what I could see they were still in bloom. Always purdy.

But now I’m stuck at the airport. Not stuck stuck. Delayed. My plane ran over a bolt on the runway during landing and they had to get a part from Dulles. The kitties should have me home by now to comfort them during my being away, but even that is delayed. And though this bolt thing has thwarted me getting home, I keep coming back to: which plane lost the bolt? I’m assuming it’s a needed part. And even if not – isn’t that what the Concord hit right before it upon taking off in France a few years ago – effectively sealing that airline’s fate?

The pope came and went from DC….and not a moment too soon. He’s NYC’s problem now. But there are more priests in this airport than you can shake an altar boy at.

Upon wondering around DC I stumbled up on an eyeglass store. One that’s hip but not too artsy-fartsy. I mean, they are, but not TOO artsy-fartsy. Mohammed helped me (not the religious leader, just a store clerk). As you may have read here over the years, I’m always in search of a great pair of frames. I always feel like I settle and never truly happy with whatever I select (save one pair).

But I did find them this time. They were my first selection and even though Mo (as I thought of him as) and I went through other glasses, we both agreed the initial pair were the ones. I then asked the $64,000 Question……or as it turns out the $1,375 question.

To paraphrase the pope: “Jesus Fuckin Christ!” Almost $1,400 for frames? I couldn’t even ask what it would cost with lenses.

I should mention these aren’t just any frames. No. I’m too good for just any frames. These are made out of horns from African water buffalo and cattle. I can only assume the carrying case is lined with baby seal fur. I didn’t ask.

The thing is – I still want the frames. So extravagant. I was telling Denton about them saying I couldn’t possibly afford them and the iPhone (not that I’m really planning on getting that anytime soon either), but his reply was priceless: “well, do you want to see or be seen?”.

 

Song by: Billie Holiday

The Metro

My trip to DC coincides with Benedict XVI. Oh lucky me!!!!

Oh lucky him!!

I am such a fan of the Third Reich, it will be an honour just to be in the same city as der Fuher.

…obviously I’m kidding.

Actually, I know we won’t cross paths, because most of my transport will be via the Metro. In an effort to promote ridership during his visit, the WTA put up posters a of a bobble head pope riding the escalators up from the Metro. ….and then over protests of it, they were actually forced to take them down. Can you believe it?

But it will be a pain with him here. Because wherever he goes, so do 25,000 soldiers from the Clone Wars.

Seriously, the Metro is expecting ridership to increase by 25,000 each day over the next two days. Lucky me!

Except for a few transfer stations, I don’t think it will impact me too much. g-d, I fucking hope not.

So W, Cheney and Benedict in the same town at the same town. When does the 4th Horseman get here?

 

Song by: Berlin

Cherry Pie


Meredity provided the pic – but each time I look at it I can’t help but think the these Peeps are pole dancing to this song.

You may or may not know that I don’t ‘celebrate’ easter. I don’t believe that anyone named Jesus died for my sins and then rose three days later in the form of a rabbit who went and hid dyed, hard-boiled eggs.

Yeah – I’ve been away for a few days (more on that, possibly, later) and yes, this is the best I can come up with. And on top of that, next Tuesday, I’ve been slated to be a guest star blogger for Large Tony.

….I guess I should start drafting something – huh? I’m open to suggestions.

Song by: Warrant

You Dropped a Bomb on Me

You Dropped a Bomb on Me

So much news yesterday – where to start…..where to start.

First off – apparently I’m worse than Osama bin Laden and Muqtada al-Sadr combined.

In a speech delivered for a conservative Christian group, Sally Kern (US Representative – OK(R)) said that gays and lesbians were the “biggest threat “our nation has ever faced “even more than terrorism or Islam…” She goes on to say that gays are “infiltrating” city councils, responsible for the demise of world societies and compared being gay to a “cancer” that apparently needs to be cut out.

Of course, let’s not overlook that not everyone who is Islamic is a terrorist…….or gay. And not every terrorist is Islamic…..or gay. Whatta fuckin’ cunt. Yeah – I said it. I went there.

She also said she never expected her talk to be taped and/or released. To be honest, that is the worst part for me. Old Sally was planning on hiding behind the cloak of invisibility. But let’s face it – only Harry Potter had that, as it was one of the three Deathly Hallows (oops…spoiler alert!).

Then there was Karl Rove at the University of Iowa Sunday, being confronted with an at-times hostile crowd of 1,000.

At one point during the speech, Rove reportedly lashed out at some of the students, saying, “You got a chance to ask your questions later and make your stupid statements, let me make mine.”

Classy!!!!! Though he has never claimed to be a statesman.

Another person asked Rove if he has ever shed a tear over the war in Iraq. “I shed a lot of tears and I have been inspired by many of the people who feel their son or daughter should not have to die in vain,” he replied.

BULLLLLLLSHIT. Who the fuck does he think he’s fooling??

Toward the end of the speech, a member of the crowd yelled, “Can we have our $40,000 back?”
Rove replied, “No, you can’t.”

No surprise there. Ca-ching!

One audience member told Rove that MSNBC’s Keith Olbermann named him the “worst person ever.”

“Ever?” Rove joked. “Yea, worse than Hitler, worse than Stalin, worse than Mao and worse than the person who introduced aluminum baseball bats.”

Personally, I love how he’s absolved himself of all his evils and how he doesn’t think he fits into that little exclusive club – save the guy who introduced the aluminum baseball bat. Though I wouldn’t mind introducing said bat to his head. Several times.

Let’s see – what else is there…..

Oh yeah – a Vatican official has listed drugs, pollution and genetic manipulations as well as social and economic injustices as new areas of sinful behavior.

Technically, I guess I only have one of the four of those. Though to piss off the pope I’d happy to try genetic manipulation. Unless of course, that’s just a fancy term for ‘choking the chicken’…..then I got that one covered.

Song by: the Gap Band

Mission of Mercy

I stumbled across this little ditty the other day:  Pseudo nekkid Mormons!

Sorry – pseudo nekkid Mormon’s with six packs.  ….and not the beer.  Because they don’t drink, ya know.

Apparently, just like Falcon movies, it is against the law to have any kind of body hair in Utah.



I don’t know much about Mormonism  – only what comes from the Osmonds, the Romneys, Big Love and Angels in America.  But this I know – why aren’t they posing in their ‘sacred undergarments’?  Let’s see what protects them physically and spiritually. C’mon!!!!  Throw something to the fans!

I am doubtful that these are actual Mormons. No, I’m guessing just some waxed Ken doll-like men who needed the money to pay off their student loan, or to get enough cash to get to the Big Apple so they can make it as a STAR!

….and when that fails, well, then eventually porn, g0-go dancing and a series of out-calls.

Song by: the Motels